Pick Up Lines

Well I've decide that guys just don't put in the effort any more when chatting u up!!!!

Whats wrong with some good old fashioned pick up lines????
Not the same old boring ones that you hear everywhere but good ones deserve the well earned attention!!!

Heres one I heard the other day!

"How much does a polar bear weigh????................."

"Enough to break the ice.............. Hi I'm .............."

i dont call them pick up lines....

more like - sentences ending with a slap

But one that was used on me that i will always remember is:

"Shut up and Fuck me...."

and being the complete angel that i am, i did what i was told....

Hows about -

"Wanna Play war???? Yeah, I'll lay on the ground and you blow the fk outta me!!!!

Always a good one when earing the army pants

lol.... i like that one!

person a: "wanna go back to my house for sex and pizza?"
person b: "no"
person a: "why, don't you like pizza?"

One that was once used on me....
"Nice boots wanna root?"
Oh the shit you here in country pubs!!!! But they were very nice boots. brand new pair of RM's

i've forgotten all mine been too long since i used them!

lol, classic!

/me writes it down on back of hand

id be tooscared to use a pick up line.. too much emotional bashing goes with it.. womens lib blahblahblah.. i open doors cuz thats what i was tought as a young lad.. as for pick up lines..im a fan of ' hello'..... and seee how it goes from there

I too have never actually used a pick-up line (too shy ) But have alwayz been a fan of

Can I borrow your phone number cause I have lost mine.

lol id go the " can u sleep with me ivelost my teddy bear..."

Guy- If i was a male prostitute how much would you pay?

Chick- Nothing

Guy- Ok lets lets go......


Harley

i've heard so many in my time.. none of which have worked...

"Hi, I'm Mr Right and I hear you've been looking for me?"

"Can I borrow? 50 cents, I have to call my mum and tell her I've just met the woman of my dreams"

"nice dress, would look so good on my bedroom floor"

it's endless!!!

Here's one for the girls to use

"Im wearing revlon colour-stay lipstick, Wanna help me test the claim that it won't kiss off"

nice ones guys...

heres one from a movie...

guy looks at ladies tag on shirt.... 'just as i thought..... made in heaven!'

bahahahahaha.. love it mel.. beats the old

"Quick someone call heaven... i've found their missing angel"

You're so Hot you would make the devil sweet

ha ha ha ha ha

every little girl wants a pony and i'm good at method acting.... wanna ride me???

hahah u girls are good.. theres some beautys there!

now to write them all down and test them all out at ONE...


ummmm nah i dont think so ...

ONE is not the place for it... get your butt to Red Square!!

i think ive only ever been been to red square once... i usually walk right past due to the massive line ups... not my thing

'feel like a shag?.....no, well lay down and I'll have one'

works every time (if you're a girl asking a guy ha ha ha)

i think girls get it easy.... us guys are seriously at a losing end in this

yeah, coz you guys will shag anything...we are choosier ha ha ha....

try going up to a girl and just saying....'you know you wanna be my bitch'
she'll be laughing so hard she may just agree

im a hunt u down SMP... and try that

Hey did you just grab my ass????????
NO !!! Damm

no, its my trademark pick up line and I'll just say you stole it from me....so thereofre you are already my be-atch!!!!

you know it, I know it....everyone knows that you know that I know that you know you wanna be my bitch DelusionL

whoa.... i thinkill just change my name to *Confuzzled* now.....


thats too much for a sober mind to handle....

Mine

"How U Doin?"


"wanna talk stuff".......................

Works every time

" Didn't anyone tell you that you wanted to sleep with me???
I thought you knew!!!!! "

Some people might be confused

If you were my homework i'd be doing you on my desk right now!!

ha ha ha...I like it.....gonna try it one of these daze....

i like the home work one. might work if i was 16-17 again...

The word of the day is LEGS.
Let's go back to my place and spread the word

thats a good one meika! i love dodgy pick up lines......

I know so many dodgy pick up lines.....

" Hi, I would like to award you the Coopers Pale Award for looking sooo good.
Now if you will give your name, number and other vital statistics I would like to enter you in our grand prize drawing which will win you and all expense paid date with me!!!!!

six or seven paleys and everything looks good!

my fav

...wana go halves in a rape charge??

the guy that said it is one of the funniest guys i know, and its a very him thing to say.....made me laugh

"Show us ya boobs!"

Some times that works... Depending on the crowd at the Royal Admiral ofcourse...

on your back!
make like a star fish!

Class!!!!


All class jase..... The Nautical theme is very interesting

how goods your gag reflex???

LOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

this can only lead into more debauchery and ribald comments.. and degredation to women folk of our nation...


lucky we are aussies... we dont give a frk bout that


so... i need a beer and to get laid.. not fussed what comes first... both at once would be good too...

"I may be shy and bashful in person, but im tuff and vocal on the internet..... wanna watch me on my webcam?"

The voices in my head told me to come over and talk to you!!!!

I'm worried about some of these ROFL

"HI, *drops rohypnol in drink*"

ouch!!!!!

This could be very educational.
You never know!!!!!!

hey guys just were a wedding ring then they will be giving you the pick up lines...strange but true

HAHAHAHAHAHAAHA YOUR A FUCKING GOD AAAAAAAAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA I CAN'T EVEN SPELL IT AAAAAAAAAAAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAA

here's one i've used in the drive thru window at maccas many a time and occasionally i got a number haha...::txt inside * * are actions if you can't do it sitting down then dont hehe

Hey sweety, my names Daana, but you can call me; later *wink click* *thrust with mid section* pyow pyow and then afterwards even if it isnt her name wisper "i love you keesha" and either sit down and put your arm around her or put your hands on her hips and kiss her neck softly...then after that if your feeling lucky give her a kiss on the lips...if she slaps you, you'll know it wasn't ment to be


to make this work you must thrust your mid section together with saying pyow pyow so there will be 2 mid section thrusts this way
oh and this has worked once purely because the girl was laughing to hard to say no trust fella's it works gurls actually do like a sense of humor

This post has been edited by Maori_Messiah: Sep 15 2005, 06:48 PM

then yeh the old one nice shoes wanna fuck always bringin it back to the old school Haha

ummmmmmmm, speaking in a kiwi acent without using the word piss and you can generally pick up the majority of adelaide um...if you have a monter dick walk around with it hanging out and eventually if not picked up by the cops you'll get picked up by a cock fiend yeh chicks arnt that hard to figure out

then again there's the old one i used to use and on occasians still do, CHECK OUT THE TONGUE!!

Theres always
" Baby, the only reason I would kick you out of bed would be to to fuck you on the floor "

OOOOooOooOoooOoooo I'd be lmao before i actually thought he may be serious...i mean really...uncomtability is not an aphrodesiac

My name isn't elmo but you can tickle me anytime!!!!!!!

YEEEEH!!!! haha

wanna root?

Nope. I have my period. Thanks for asking tho.

Whats the speed limit of sex???????????
68
Cos at 69 YOU have to turn around!!!!!!!!

lol.... nice.....

88 is similar, but for obesity sex

Screw me if Im wrong, but haven't we me before???????


Be unique and different, say yes

No. Im a man.

you have the most beautiful eyes ive ever seen



wanna root?

Okay, so I came over here to ask you to dance, but Im concerned. We could hit it off really well, have a few drinks, and next thing you know you're giving me your number becos Im too shy too ask for it...... I finally get the nerve to call, we take in a movie, have some dinner, I relax, you relax, we go out a few more times, get to know each others friends, spend lots of time together, then finally have to get past this sexual tension and really develop this intense sex life that is truly incredible, decide our relationship is solid and stable, so we move in together for a while, then a few months later get married. I get a promotion, you get a promotion, we buy a bigger house. You really want kids, but I really want freedom, but we have a kid anyway, only to find that I am resentful, the sparks start to fade and to rekindle them we have two more lovely kids. Now I work too much to keep up with the bills, have no time for you, you're stressed and stop taking really good care of yourself, so to get past our slow sex life and my declining self-confidence I turn to an outside affair for sexual gratification. You find out because Im careless and a lousy liar, you throw me out (justifiabily so) and we have to explain to the kids why mommy and daddy are splitting up. Thats just tooo sad. Think about the children. For gods sake, if you dance with me and we hit it off, lets just keep it sexual, because we both know where its going!!!!

got ur man rags??

"bites tongue"

hahahahahahahahaa

hehehehehehehehehe! men do get them too!

i cant get the thing in

ur a sick man!

Get talking to a chick and mention that you are a dolphin trainer at seaworld and you are down for the weekend to see your grandparents.

when i saw Brapdat as last poster in here i thought... " oh shit.. wat has he said.. this can only be dirty nasty mean or down right degrading....." and im amazed.. i was wrong... dolphns are the only other animal on the planet that have sex for fun....

And a pigs orgasm lasts for 30 mins!!!!!

so mate porky pig with a flipper and u get a nymphomaniac animalistic relation ship with offsrping that look like... fast moving grey bacon rashers with fins and a snorkel... and a tail that revolves to propel itself???

so when i get slapped in the face for asking if she wants a root and get called a pig i can say "well baby my orgasms last for thirty minutes, do yours?"

new pick-up line "wanna be my sow?"

brown cow?

ok, my turn.......... 2 ways to go.

1..

got a girlfriend?
no
want one?

2..

got a girlfriend?
yes
want a new one?

not the best but u have to have something

its straight up I'll give it that.... I like it!!!

so... meika.... nice shoes.....

are you absolutely certain of that Oldskoolie maaaate....

so he claims

Do you like whales?





How bout a humpback at my place

21 Pickup Lines That Could Get You Killed!
1. If you and I were squirrels, could I bust a nut in your hole?

2. I'd like to wrap your legs around my head and wear you like a feedbag.

3. If it's true you are what you eat, I could be you by morning.

4. How do you like your eggs; poached, scrambled, or fertilized?

5. I was about to go masturbate, and I need a name to go with your face.

6. Roses are red, violets are blue, I like spaghetti, let's go screw.

7. Is that a keg in your pants? 'Cause I would love to TAP THAT ASS!

8. Could I touch your belly-button....from the inside?

9. How 'bout we play lion and lion-tamer....you hold your mouth open, and I'll give you the meat.

10. Fuck me if I'm wrong, but isn't your name Yolanda?

11. I'm new in town - could I have directions to your place?

12. I love every bone in your body, especially mine.

13. You might not be the best looking girl here, but beauty is only a light switch away.

14. You're like a championship bass....I don't know whether to mount you or eat you.

15. Wanna play Pearl Harbor? It's a game where I lie back while you blow the hell outta me.

16. Your body must be a Visa, 'cause it's everywhere I wanna be.

17. Can I buy you a drink or do you just want the money?

18. I'd like to screw your brains out, but it looks like someone beat me to it.

19. I may not be the best-looking guy here, but I'm the only one talking to you.

20. That shirt looks very becoming on you, but if I were one, I'd be coming too!

21. I can't find my puppy, could you help me find him? I think he went into this hotel room...

This is my 900th post


Can i touch your boobs one time

if you were a church
I'd be kneeling at the alter
speaking in tounges

sorry was not complete when posted earlier!

lets go turkey hunting... u gobble and ill shoot!

oh dear me....he he he...that is a shocker DelusionL....has it ever worked?

never been game to use it... im not the sorta guy that uses pick up lines.... i prefer a simple 'hello'

i had the perfect chance to throw one out there last night when i bumped into meika at the bar, i recognised her she didint know who i was... i missed a perfect opertunity to try one of these shockers on here in the real world on some one that woulda lapped it up and prolly thrown one back at me

Yeah they are a great pair of fucken shoes!!!!!

you can never catch up on those missed opportunities....but next time you see her you'll know better right....courage lad

Well you missed your chance!!!!!
I would've thrown back a shocker at u too!!!!!

hahah i got that feeling i think i woulda been infor a fast moving pick up line ping pong game


how was work today ?? i reckon i shoulda stayed another hour or two last night as work wasnt to bad today 6.5hrs sleep was enuff

Hahaha. Yeah rang up work an hour b4 I was due to start and said I have that gastro thingy going around!!!!!!!
Could be good for a few days off!!!!!!

you know the human brain can function on four hours sleep I think it is

sm

hehe yaeah mine runs on that amount a fair bit... but i try to get 6hrs sleep before work... i drive trucks n bus's etc during my work so prefer to be awake for that...

meika... dissapointed SLACKER!!!!

Well we can't all be winners and grinners!!!!!!!!!

id have rather had stayed and not been a winner and grinner at work looked like more fun at tonic... so did most people stay afterwards and party ?

makes more sense this way

yer well latey thats all i have been getting, and it works

science is never wrong....why waste your free trips around the sun sleeping!!!

I was at a friends house the other night and someone turned to me and said-

"So, do you come here often???"

I just laughed and walked away.

That takes the cake as the worst pick up line I've ever heard!!!!!!

" how bout u me and the bedroom now"

talk bout getting straght to the point

hot chick last night....

guy: "aren't you that chick having sex with that collage guy?"
girl: "NO!"
guy: "wanna be?"


gay! gay! gay!

best pick up lines eva!!!!

"call me, we'll bang"

and

"you wanna fuck, I MEAN DANCE" then blush and give a cheeky smile!!!!

cheeky-ism is a wonderful tool!

good smile+a nice rack+elluring eyes+cheeky-ism= what ever the hell u want! if u've got all four "WATCHOUT! radio active man"

a police women outfit never goes astray

Yeah and I've been a bad, bad girl!!!! Will you arrest me?????

arresst u? u naughty girl i'm taking u home and putting you on home detention for a long time!

mahahahahahahaha....

it was good to seeya again on friday!

one is gonna go off and so am i! like a fucking rocket!!!

Home D sounds like fun!!!!!
Do I get a sexy anklet???


I'll cum find you at ONE!!!!!!!!!

oh u'll get more than a fancy anklet!!!! i'm sure i could arrange a nice young lad to give u a pearl necklace!!!! lol.....

we are very naughty girls and we should be punished!

who will punish us?

Jebus will

u naughty little girls u r, and throw away the keys

NAUGHTY AND PROUD OF IT.... mahahahahahahaha.....

*GRINZ*

i knew ur opinion or reaction would be a part of our convo sooner or later!!!!

cheeky i tell u..... very cheeky

ah, Oldskoolie has found some chicks that crap pick up lines may just work on...good luck matey

CHEEKY.........MAYBE.........EVIL........DEFINATELY!!!!
Im sure we could add an evil spin to this!!!!!

twisted is what I'd categorise you guys as...its a good thing...the world we live in is twisted so you fit right in

twisted or shit talkers?

hmmmmm......

i'll take a little of both! or perhaps just attention seekers with no shame that love gettine a reaction???????

*DING*DING*DING*

WE HAVE A WINNER!!!!!

yep, thats it...you said it...I didn't wanna say that in case you got offended ha ha ha

but then you don't sound like the type who's easily offended - and that is a good thing I say

1. When I go in I might cause pain. I cause you to spit and ask you not to swallow. I can fill your hole.
What am I?


2. A finger goes in me. You fiddle with me when you’re bored. The best man always has me first.
What am I?


3. I’m spread before I’m eaten. Your tongue gets me off. People sometimes lick my nuts.
What am I?


4. I go in hard. I come out soft. You blow me hard.
What am I?


5. All day long, it’s in and out. I discharge loads from my shaft. Both men and women go down on me.
What am I?


6. I come in many sizes. When I’m not well, I drip. When you blow me, you feel good.
What am I?


7. If I miss, I hit your bush. It’s my job to stuff your box. When I come, it’s news.
What am I?


8. I offer protection. I get the finger ten times. You use your fingers to get me off.
What am I?


9. I assist an erection. Sometimes big balls hang from me. I’m called a big swinger.
What am I?


10. This useful tool is commonly found in the range of 6 inches long - the functioning of which is enjoyed by members of both sexes, it is usually found hung, dangling loosely, ready for instant action. It boasts of a clump of little hairy things at one end and a small hole at the other. In use, it is quickly inserted, almost always willingly, sometimes slowly, sometimes quickly, into a warm, fleshy, moist opening where it is thrust in and drawn out again and again many times in succession, often quickly and accompanied by squirming bodily movements. Anyone found listening in will most surely recognize the rhythmic, pulsing sound, resulting from the well lubricated movements. When finally withdrawn, it leaves behind a juicy, frothy, sticky white substance, some of which will need cleaning from the outer surfaces of the opening and some from its long glistening shaft. After everything is done and the flowing and cleansing liquids have ceased emanating, it is returned to its freely hanging state of rest, ready for yet another bit of action, hopefully reaching its bristling climax twice or three times a day, but often much less.
What is it?


will post anwser up in a min, will let u ponder with these a bit

7 - a newspaper

8 - gloves

10 - a toothbrush

??????

1. Mouthwash.

3. Peanutbutter or nutella

4. chewing gum

6. Nose

ur doing good, i few more and i will post up the answers

2. Pocket...... I don't think so

I can't work the rest out I have a strainrd brain now!!!!!!! Ouch!!!!

thankz

This post has been edited by meika: Sep 19 2005, 05:18 PM

2. is a wedding ring

Man: Haven't I seen you someplace before?
Woman: Yes, that's why I don't go there anymore.
Man: Really? I heard it was because everyone there calls you a sl*t.


Man: Is this seat empty?
Woman: Yes, and this one will be if you sit down.
Man: There's no need to get on your knees and s*ck me off just yet.



Man: Your place or mine?
Woman: Both. You go to yours, and I'll go to mine.
Man: That's cool, cause after I'm done sh*gging you in the back of my
car, I don't give a sh*t where you go.



Man: So, what do you do for a living?
Woman: I'm a female impersonator.
Man: That explains the moustache then! CLASSIC!!!!



Man: How do you like your eggs in the morning?
Woman: Unfertilised.
Man: No problem, I'll just shoot my load up you're a***.



Man: I would go to the end of the world for you.
Woman: But would you stay there?
Man: Probably, cause you seem like the kind of chick that is
possible to shake off once you've been sh*gge


Man: Would you like to dance?
Woman: I'd rather eat glass.
Man: I think you mis-heard me. I said you look fat in those pants.



Man: Where have you been all my life?
Woman: Fortunately, somewhere else.
Man: Just as well cos I've been sh*gging your mum while your dad watches.


Man: You're pretty...
Woman: P*ss off.
Man: Don't interrupt, You're pretty f***'n ugl

1. a dentist of course

ok here u go

ANSWERS:

1. A dentist
2. A wedding ring
3. Peanut butter
4. A chewing gum
5. An elevator
6. A nose
7. A newspaper boy
8. A glove
9. A crane
10. A toothbrush

SCORING:

0 - 1 YIKES!!
2 - 4 Get your mind out of the gutter!
5 - 7 Good job.
8 -10 Are you asexual?

5. an elevator

7. postman

9. a crane

oops bit slow

some good ones there.. had me thinking...

now... wheres those two girls that need punishing???

meika im sure u have more pick up lines...

plenty more matey!!!!!!!!

Ive just changed my name

one of my mates and me have this thing weneva either of us is bored, heres his last one...
(This was an sms)

u and me. how about it?
bring urself. bring naked. call me and lets make out tomorrow!

i was in perfect form for pick up lines sat night.. blind freeeking drunk on cocktails...

u think i could remeber any??? luckily theres was only one single girl at the party so we chatted all night anyways.

*GRINZ AGAIN*

"sit on my face and i'll guess your weight"
pure kevin b wilson gold....

guy: Is your name Judy????

girl: No piss off......

guy: Heavy Judy???

i dont need pick up lines. I just dress and dance like a Backstreet Boy and occasionally tweek my nads.


Its yet to work, but i'l keep tryin'

tweeking nads didint work for micheal jackson.....

















or did it???

i occasionally run around nakie!!!! but thats only under a full moon!! saturday there was a full moon and i was drunk and there was a full moon!

my nipples were quite errect in the cool spring breeze!!!

oldskoolie, you should try the "gerhard reinke's wanderlust" tried and tested manouvere.........don a pair of lime green budgie smugglers, and pop a nut out the side! even if it doesn't pull the ladies, you'll still have a conversation piece

*writes it down*

learning, you are, good to see, young padewan. /end yoda voice/

haahhaha K;ub kittys spicing things up round here...

birght green budgie smugglers... now thats a look straight outta the 80's

problem was it wasnt his nads he was tweakin !!!!

was waiting for some one to pick that one spacecadet

another one thats bound to get u a slap.


Boy are my ears cold. Mind if I use your thighs as ear muffs?

Might even help if you tweak your nads at this point. Probably the only tweaking they will get all night!

i think we are doingpretty well.. now we just need to print out a paper list of them all and go on a anthems pick up night and try them all out .... group attack... saftey in numbers???

Awwwwwwwww, it's funny cause i think i know who would write such a thing like that



I don't know you but i like you

im still waiting for the proof.... hahhaa

tonights anthems forums on fire.... nice n active

This would e a hilarious idea for an anthems night....group dare kinda thing...each person get ten dodgy pick up lines to choose from, and they get points for every time they use it and more points for a positive response....ha ha ha....that would be a funy as pub crawl!!!

SMP!!! wicked idea! all pick up attempts must be viewed by another uers to verify the attempt and the line used...

would definintly be a night of laughter and fun

I'll be the judge!!!

i thought u where the test dummy???

or I could compete but Id probably win!!!!!

well i know i woulndt be able to compete... ill just ummm... drink the night away

scared of competition???

hahha maybe.. or maybe id use my first 2-3 on you before we left the first pub

Get some practice in!!!!!!!!!!!!

then again you have heard all of these ones now.... damit! need some fresh material!

You'll have to do your homework!!!

*opens books to page 'Meika' a strange creature full of fun and laughter of cheeky nature yet mischevious intentions causes great glee and mirth amonst others when close buy" cannot be tamed best left to run free andparty"


hmm ok .... i think i need another book...

DelusionL, just use my favourite line (and it always gets a positive resonse from guys for some reason)....just go up to a chick and say ' you know you wanna be my bitch'

but I bar that on for the pick up line pub crawl....I have the patent on that one....

lmao.

Was that the dictionary???????

yes well we have established the fact u girls get it easier when trying topick up... as us guys are hopless when it comes to chicks...

heheh © ® to SMP for that line...

i need a typically craig like... read that as boganish style pick upline...

Meika it was the big book of all things devilish!

I bet that was a big book too!!!!

What else is in there????

it said u liked dressing up in leather and wearing little red horns on your head...


also said that i was going to bed in a minute....

so... *looks at bed* how bout it

Im sur you can entertain yourself!!!!!!

*puts a cross next to that one...*

nope that didint work.. ill try again later

ok. sleep on it and maybe one might cum to you in your sleep or on a fresh morning mind

ok ahhwell thats one i wont use

fresh mind.. fresh thoughts.... catch yas all later im finally gonan get to bed.....

gnight all!

Hey Good Lookin!!!!! Whatcha got cookin????
Nothin could be finer than the taste of your vagina!!!!!

Maybe I should've re worded that cos it sounds wrong coming from me!!!

Classic munter one:

" I love you, will you come home with me!?"

One i have used a few times is:

"Excuse me, are you any good at massages" "Then can i please have one?"

don't sound wrong at all.

Typical male reply!!!!!!!!

I like Side Show Bob's

"Ohh Shake it Madame, Capital Knockers!"

One for the girls -

*Takes hand and sniffs at it*
"Eww your hand smells like dog, that's ok it's going to smell like pussy soon!"

oh thats bad.....

meika... im worrying about you.... well im not worrying.... im just worried i may not be invited to the viewing of your actions

Exactly what do you mean by that DelusionL???????????????????????

Missing out on watching you eat your culinary delights?

PeAke has hit the target

And what are the culinary delights????

QUOTE(meika @ Sep 23 2005, 11:21 AM)
Hey Good Lookin!!!!! Whatcha got cookin????
Nothin could be finer than the taste of your vagina!!!!!
*




blink.gif

huh.gif

This post has been edited by DelusionL: Sep 23 2005, 08:25 PM

hahahaha....

the lovely topic of rug munching!!!! hey a girls gotta experiment!!!

YES!!! and a mans gotta watch

lol...

mysterious man

particpating is better than spectating

girls know their shit!

exactly! i think of it as research!

LOL!!!
thats where the video camera comes in handy. then u can review it, just un case u dont get it right the first time......

oh i always get it right!!!!

hahahahaha.....

Can I buy you a drink, or do you just want the money?

Wanna play house? You be the screen door and I'll slam you all night long.

I'll just have the money thanks!!!!

i want an "anthems pick up line" t shirt!

its a cult!!!!!!!!!!!!!

LOL, Great idea. something like:

Get Fucked @ anthems

LMAO...maybe we could have t shirts with quotes from the counting thread too!!!!

ahh my favourite lil pick up chick!

Meika!!!!


Sex is a killer...want to die happy?

He's back with a vengence and pick up lines to boot!!!!

theres this old classic...


What do you say we go back to my room and do some math: Add a bed, subtract our clothes, divide your legs, and multiply.


or this one... this i think u would like

Your place or mine? Tell you what? I'll flip a coin. u give me head at my place, tails i f*ck u in the ass at yours!

LMAO!!!!

Yeah I do like that one!!!!!!!

Your on fire tonight!!!!!! OUCH!!!!!!!

First, I'd like to kiss you passionately on the lips, then, I'll move up to your belly button.


" hey do u want to have sex with me??? "no" well do u mind holding still while i have sex with you?

Don't hold back now!!!!!

Life is like a dick. When it gets hard, "Fuck it".

Im hard..... you wet???

LMFAO!!!!!!

Don't take much to arouse you!!!!!

Do you wanna go back to my place, fuck, then never speak again? I do...





lifes short.. so lets fuck... and see whats left afeterwards??

Your working in a bit of a bad boy nasty edge to it now!!!!!

Hi. I'm gay, think you can convert me?



Grab your jacket, you've scored. Let's go.



If I'm a pain in your ass... We can just add more lubricants.





blunt.. no messing around....


if it takes 2 minutes to work up the courage and 10 seconds to use a line.. why waste time get stright to the point and move on....


I may not be the best looking guy here, but I'm the only one talking to you.

If these pain killers weren't affecting me so mentally right now Id be coming back with some good ones at ya!!!!!!

yeah yeah.... u cant keep up tonight!!!!




Ive just taken a viagra... that means we got half an hour to find some place to f*ck!!!!



i think im off to bed anyways.. need some sleep


gnight!!!!!

"Hi, my names Nicholas. That's how i like my woman to be."

hehhe meika... u devils neice

Can I impregnate you with my Demon spawn?


im a little broke.. do u mind if we share a taxi home?

This post has been edited by DelusionL: Sep 27 2005, 07:03 PM

No..... Actually Im looking for the spawn of the angel!!!!

Then together we can take over the world!!!!!!

hey baby, you like cricket? wanna get down to my members end and face a couple of balls?

What fucks like a tiger and winks??????

*Then you give them a wink*

"wanna fuck?"
"no"
"well, lay there while i have one"

or my personal favourite................
"hey baby, you don't sweat much for a fat chick"

lol

nice avatar oldskoolie haha

is that like ' nice shoes....."

im not sure i can deal with it....


Not the file. I can deal with that! I have canasta's the size of ferris wheels.

Its the dial up im talking about! Im not sure i can deal with the dial up!!!!

I will remove this shortly !

THAT IS F***** DISGUSTING!

WTF?

that is not gd babe! man, if i had a permanent texta with me that culd go thru to that link, id be drawing over it until the ink ran out!

hmmm, if only...

i dont think anyone shuld even think of using a pick up line ther, anyone that gets turned on by that.....

but maybe,
"Hi, iv got some steroids in my car... and since ur already naked...."

maybe u shuld do that now?!

*removes his eyes and stomps on them*


im sorry.. but ilike my women feminen... not looking like arny with after a chop with a bit of a nip and tuck!

thankyou DelusionL!

ok, uv had ur fun i think, i dnt wana be ur mum or anything, but, EWWWW
Ther is so much beta.....

ummm, back to the theme of this topic...

"hi im really sori to bother u but i think i lost my number, can i have yours?"

i think we'v all heard of that one tho.

This post has been edited by Monica: Sep 29 2005, 09:46 PM

a woman with curves... a real body.. not somthing made from silicone and steroids... ewwww.....

" ive lost my teddy bear... will u sleep with me tonight?"

soor y thats freaky!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I had heard stories but , my jaw just dropped


you were warned

Thats a gd one Del!




i guess, sori for over reacting, just PLEASE dont do it again! unless u wana sart paying for Del's eyes 2 get fixd evry time he has to stomp on em!...

errr *scratches out eyes*.......i should listend to the warning. that was wrong on alot of levels

Jase are u gona take it out tonight?? ther culd be some innocent little child surfing the net & wat do ya kno?!....

/me looks in missvixens direction. usually when i get blind with some one it normally means getting drunk and getting drunk would put me in the moood to use one of the baove lines so now that we are both blind.. how bout it???? lets do what im gonnna tell my mates we did anyway!

jase...dont remove it till I've looked...I must see!!! After those comments I must see it too....Like Oldskoolie I'm stuck in narrowband world....downloading now....will I be sick....should I put food down?

hahaha such a typical thing for a male to say/do DelusionL lol

it goes well with this thread:P

but its harldy something id ever say. so yoursafe besides... we already established the fact im too old u can call me gramps

haha so i can come out of hiding now lol

i think pick up lines are corney and dont go for guys that use them.......unless they are make me laugh and are not the same shit ones used over and over, origionality is good

hahahhaa...eeeeurrrghghhhh...Jase those chicks were out of control....but then beefcake guys are just as unattractive too....maybe I won't go to the gym EVER AGAIN!!!!

thats the reason behind this thread. to poke fun at them i dontthink anyone woudl use wats been suggested!

altho id love to see the reactions from a few of these!

well im off to sleep.. gnight folks!

lol@ the link.... one word gents............ SNAP

ur sig is misleading oldskoolie!

if the 'chick' in the front flexed any harder her uterus would fall out and her tits would dissappear back into het arm pits...

As for pick up lines... hmm....

"Can i be your bitch please?"

"Is your clitoris moving out, or are you just happy to see me?"

"You make me want to cut myself"

Oldskoolie is misleading.....he don't exist, unless you have massive boobs

When will you actually come out for a group drink matey!!!!

One day... when you least expect it. I will appear! Im thinking of organising a Pool night somewhere... Few drinks, some 8 ball.... etc...

Why how?

LOL i hear ya smp! Oldskoolie grow up those ARE gd lines tho... i'll pay u 2 use them if u ever meet anything like that... i wont pay for the hospital bed tho...

yea oldskoolie im confused too, monica how is his sig misleading??? huh

GOLD!!!!!!!!!

ferk, I am crying! hahahahaha

If you work/study near my work, im more than happy to come and meet you...

lol...

"Wanna come back to my place??? My dad want's his arse back!"

wow. okay that got confusing for me too!!!

um, ur sig is misleading coz its pretty and stuff, but it just leads to the nuts n bolts forum.

and wer do u wrk? my wrk is on wst tce, city. study is in Goodwood...

sorry to offend

twas just so amazing and freaky-humans huh?
not sposed to be a turn on
there was the over 18 restriction , so I will have to arrest you now

indy middool ov dee cidy.

wateva! i will run and i will hide

oh, okay, i'll meet u ther 2moz then!

...

yeah thanks Jase my eyes are bleeding

STOP STOP OH SHIT I cant breathe

your on fire, bud

hahhhahhahaahahahahahaahhaa

wtf?

OK. I'll be there

oldskoolie and monica sitting in a tree

K-i-s-s-i-n-g !

LOL

gross, freaky, flexing things & Jase sitting in a tree...

F.U.*.*.*.*.*!

"hey baby...... wanna bump uglies?"

huh? r u talking to ME??!

so you have met oldskoolie

ur using my words against me!!! NOT FAIR

meh, too late to take them back now...


have we met Oldskoolie?? i think that is a gd question....

wana play doctors and nurses?

maybe...

how intrigueing!.....




hey, wats the last blue car in ur sig?

hahaha

oldskoolie u fucking crack me up lmao

gotta agree with ya there missvixen the guys a fuckin lunatic...... i love it!

oldskoolies a cheap assed petrol pinching grinch

why must they be so close to you to meet them.. subie suck too much petty to go for a drive???

then again... my rx7 stays home 5-6 days a week.... i feel the pain....


scoot scoot scooting along....... soon.....


'i may not be the best looking guy here..... but im the only one talking to you'

Im just over weight and lazy.... thanks to the internet!!!



Not really. I work alot of hours a day/week.
I dont get much time for anything else. Im basically married too. So i have the life of a grown up to try and fabricate

your user photo is absolutely gold too!

I've just moved you to the top of my 'to do' list.

There gotta be a keg in your pants, coz I wanna tap that ass.

Hey baby lets play army I'll lay down you can blow me up.

yeah i know theyre really bad thats why i dont get much action hahahahahahhahahaa

hehe saw the shirt of that in Streetcore today, i quietly lol'ed to myself

u cant quietly 'lol'...


it would be a chuckle...

sounds good...until then you are a mystery to me baby....

Mr E to you

slacker

i do 50hrs a week at work.. wednesday and sundays ar emy days off. i can understand lack of time!

lucky being single gives me my own time and space. but id love to drop 10hrs a week off my work load. but hat just wont happen...

Dood! i do between 58 and 74 hrs most weeks. Mon to Sat... Some sundays. Although the last couple of weeks ive been a bit slack and done just over 55hrs/wk, But our busy period is coming and when volumes increase by over 600% some slackness is needed before hand(for me ).....I like my job.
And working long hours is the only way to get things done.

Mr E???? You missed out a letter...isn't it Mr Ed

yup im with you there. i enjoy wat i do so i dont mind. ive done 4 yrs now at an average of 50 hrs t0 60 hrs a week. never dropping under 50 in that time. day shifts night shifts arvo shifts... now on 5 day shifts. split up 3 days on 1 day off 2 days on 1 day off....

i tried 'hello' tonight.... that didint work either...

lol.... im surprised

yes would be written something like LNL

LTM laugh to myself....???

Laugh Not loud? LNL

tonight im going go karting.. so ill try.....

"do u mind if i check your fluids"

" ive got some loose nuts.. and it looks like you have just the tool to tighten them"

LNL!!!!

LVL!!

LAM (laughing at myself!)

yesterday, while out in the city with an exworkmate, one of her frends was talkin 2 her, n she hadnt introduced us yet, so wen this guy said he was tired... LOL... i said i was Monica!... hmm, he walkd off... he wasnt hot or anything & we talkd a little bit later on, & he'd already forgoten about it, so it was okay in the end. but once id said it i felt like slapping myself!!!

hmmmmmm, LMFAO!... if ur not laughing at me i guess u had 2 b ther, N if u R... shutup!

uh oh... this thread again..... 16 pages of face slaps for del....


cris had me at " where the fuck are u bitch!" via sms at about 10:45...

haha didnt smp try to pick u up last night wid 'u no u wana be my bitch'

oh.. i knew i was her bitch soon as she spotted me top of the stairs in the DnB room....

i was a gonnna!

I would have had to LOL you on the spot!

I try and pick everyone up with that line...and when you say it to guys they usually respond with a yes!!! Guys are such suckers..love you all xx

how could some one resist a death metal raspy "YOU KNOW you want to be MY BITCH!"

coming from such a class looking chickky babe as u SMP

hahaha i wanna see how that one works. i can already envision a painful outcome

Not so sure about this one hun, I'm not sure what guys you talkin too

Tootles

I've heard this one..
"if i followed you home would you keep me?"

hi my names Chris

that one usually works for me but hem i run out of things to say

and by then the chicks that are only looking for a quicky know exactly whats goign on in his head and they're like ok.. lets go!!

thats right.....works every time on that type
if it doesnt i go on to the next one thats giving me the eye...............

the evil eye?? or the 'how you doing' eye??

the "how you doin" eye of course............

hey your cute wanna leave all my lights on for me???

yeah sure! HOw about i give you a kick start too??

are you coming on to me???
ive got a girlfriend you know
she wouldnt be very impressed
although she is a bit of a tart

my place or yours???

how about your girlfriends place??? then she can join in too

now your talking!!

lol, this is entertaining...

it's the chris and cat thread

you wanna bring your girlfriend too??

no girlfriend for me... not for a while yet anyway

single life is great

yeah is good for a while but i got damn tired of dowloading new pron everyday
there much better in real life

sounds like youve come out of a bad one??

Not so much a bad one, but we'd been together for a few yrs. Just grew apart.

I should have really broken it off at the start of the year but silly me waited until a few months ago... thats life...

awww hun sori to hear bout that....

hmmm just curious... how long have u been raving?.. or lately anyway...

well since i've been here (adelaide) i havn't... went to advent*jah (victoria) once, but thats about it..

i've been a bit of a club monster i guess

haha alrite u planning on comming to one soon?

yeh, can't do the 3rd tho cause there's a chance that i'll still be in perth

but i'll be seein ya at harder tip

perth rofl i know a few ppl that live in perth!...

yeah 4 sure...

lol

i heard a friend of mine say this!! i swear!

ok

"could i get a photo of you? i wana show santa what i want for x-mas"

not too sure how well it would work, but in the right pplace, at the right time.. maybe wen you hav a camera at a rave, and you see sumone who looks kinda interesting, but you think of me and these words of wisdom.. anybody, plz feel free to use em... & make sure you let me know how it goes...

i still hold a special place in my heart for KBW's best line:
"do u f@%$ on first dates?
does your dad own a brewery?
can i fell ya tits?
or will u show em to me?"

um, i have used many things to get pics of biddies
1 - hey how's it going you girls look pretty off tap i'm sure you want the whole world to see you *hands anthems card* can i get a photo of you for the website
2 - damn shorty turn around for a second *click* ....damn that a good ass
or 3 now this one should not be used by the faint of heart what you need to do is make sure you have a flash on what ever your using and make sure it's dark then just randomly walk up behind people and stick the cam in their face

Pick up lines aye....... i've been doing this one for a while...doesn't work but it's probably cause i laugh like a mother bitch everytime i use it

just simply "hey how's it goin' i'm from new zealand *wink*
hehe
you can all feel free to try it if ya want
peace
NICKDUB SICK KUNT YOU COMING TO VENUS?

i shall see...depends on a number of things, all those being work
but i will try and get there, nuttin like free entry

"hey baby, have you got greek in you? no? would you like some in u?"

never seems to work this one, but, more than likely due to the fact i ain't greek

(Greek guy1) Ross : Hey mate, have you eva dun yo woman up the other hole mate?
(Greek guy2) Spiros: NO WAY MATE. I'll get her pregnant!


Probably better suited to a jokes thread but i could resist. No offence intended. Im a wog myself

man: "do you wanna do it greek style?"
woman: "no"
man: "well then, what am i gonna do with these plates and baklava??"

Don't know if it works, but it's cute:

"If i followed you home, would you keep me?" (then put on your best puppy dog eyes).

If you we're a banana and i was a mokey i'd eat you, But your a monkey

him: "hey baby, did you know i have big feet? and you know what that means, huh??"
her: "no"
him: "big shoes"

Guy: Do you have the time?
Girl: Yes, it's 10:30.
Guy: No.. I meant the time to write your number down for me.

...please tell me thats worked and then show me to the blonde biddie HAHAHAHA XD

This post has been edited by Maori_Messiah: Dec 14 2005, 10:56 AM

i heard this one for a bloke once he wasn't using it, just telling everyone.

Boy: Have you tripped over a tree lately
Girl:...............NO!!!!!!!!
Boy: how about a root?

LMFAO...
thats pretty clever... tho i would piss myself laughing if i heard that one...

actually iwould piss myself laughing if i heard any pickup line being used....

BLOODY HA HA HA!!

i reckon, some of them are pretty damn funny!

Boy- how's it going *wink*
Girl- high *turns away
Boy- *slip in drink
Girl- my vodka burbon and scotch smells like shit
Boy- *runs Muahahahahahaahhahaha

man with stutter: "hey baby, i'd really like to take you home and give you a good, solid f-f-ff-f-f-f-ff--fff-f-f-ff-f conversation"

why with stutters, some chicks like that kinda shit

*licks finger and wipes on someones shirt*
Let me take you home and get you out of those wet clothes

It works- but maybe coz im a girl, and you just have to look at a guy to get him interested- girls are the hard ones to pick up

girls have it so much easier....

yay for having boobs .. n i never have a problem with picking up girls.. heh

i do not think girls have it easier...

LOL!!!!!!!! im tellin you that!!!

Some girls have the knack and some have no idea *oooh me!!!*
So im just the one whose out having a rad time by myself and/or with my mates and i dont care bout the whole 'picking up' thing no more!!!!

i have no idea.. heh.. u dont need any idea with blokes thou.. they'd be happy with 'hi.. i'm <insert name here>..' they can do the rest

LOL!
but then i get confused between whats someone being friendly and whats someone whose trying to tell you something more?

So thats why im staying single!!! YEAH BABY YEAH!
that, and i can play up more...

i'll survive very happily with mwah and hugs from everyone!! WOOT!

heh i already told u your copin one from me ravvy
meet ya in the toilets in 15 mins babe heh!

/me gets his name miixxed up and thinks he is Ravvy...


ill see u ther bec!!!

ROFL! mayve i better not come to venus thursday.. i've gotten myself into enuf trouble lately.. n by the sounds of it venus = waaay more trouble then be4 heh.. i'm too innocent for this.
*finds halo n wings*.. yer so they need an iron.. big deal

heheh you dags...

alright well if Del HAS to join in i guess thats allright...LOL!!!!

15minutes hey... i better get cracking and lookin a bit smarter then!!!!

BEK you are coming and thats final thankyouvery much!!!!!

otherwise i'll find out where you live and get ppl to drag you there!

i know where she lives...

hey bec..since we went to the movies instead of watching one at my place.. we got no cuddles:( so that means... Thursday night... BRING IT ON!!!!!

I think girls may have it easier, but most of them dont realise... which is why we are still to scared to approach guys (well, i'm not but that's a different story).

On that usually works for me is "Hi, I'm Celeste, how are you?"

weird, but it gets 'em!

Yeah, I can pick up girls- but girls can pick up girls coz they know what to say. Guys either come across as cocky & creepy and cute and bumbly
I go for the cute and bumbly ones- you just wanna hug em *hugs* to all the guys who cant make eye contact of stop stuttering when trying to pick up girls

all girls have to say to guys to get them interested is "i have a vagina"

all guys have to say to girls to get them interested is "i own 3 companies, i drive a ferrari, i own a house in springfield, i have a 12 inch penis, i can breath thru my ears, i have all the gear u need, my bank account is in 7 figures, i have free tickets to *insert name of band/rave/club here*, i have a personal table at lenzerheide, i have a diamond ring for you, i am a DJ, i am an MC, i workout everyday, i think that women are always right.............................................."

so yeah, it's just as hard for women as it is for men to pull the opposite sex - not fucking likely!!!!!

You just go up to the ladys and say g'day having a nice night, gees you look nice in your outfit, so whats your name mine is .......... if thay give you a wierd look or dont respond just think to your self neeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeext and say have a nice night and walk away. No point wasting time on some one who is not interested u will just knock your self down as women can come out with some pretty clever comments either nasty or funny


Harley

This post has been edited by Harley: Dec 14 2005, 01:13 PM

Nickdub- that'll only work til they find out your lying- then your testicles may end up in a jar on the shelf, and YOULL be the one getting sued for emotional distress we live in a sucky world (and not even the good sucky). Or you could be a total dag and find one of the few girls who dont want money or get a sugar mummy- no more working for you!
Good plan Harley- dont waste precious drink time or money if your not gonna get laid

Harley's right!! but it depends what kinda chick your after, "Clubber" chicks are bitchy and hard to talk to, us "Raver" chicks are so easy (to talk to i mean!!) we love having fun and meeting ppl.. i have yet to turn away any guy or girl who wanted to talk to me!

'Raver' Chicks are the best!! By the end of the night everyone seems to be best friends with everyone

What can we say.. us RAVER CHIX rock!!

The fact that you are open to strangers conversing with ya is great, but obviously the intention here is to try and 'pick you up', so do you burn em straight up or let em dribble on and bathe in the glory even though you are not interested

You chicks have it so, sooooo easy.

i like to say straight out that i have a boyfriend! I never lead guys on.

the conversations ususally go like this:
Guy: Hi i'm <<insert name>> , You having a good time?
Me: I'm Celeste, yeah, i'm having a great time. So, who are you here with?
Guy: I'm just here with some friends, youself?
Me: I'm hear with my boyfriend and some mates.

then i let the guy decide if he wants to continue or not! arn't i nice!!

I talk to them- i just let them know i have a boyfriend. so if they want to keep talking they do- otherwise they go to someone else to try and pick up

See, some of us girls are sensitive the mens need to pick up

and the " im here with my bf and his mates" line is a great way of saying " no chance sucker!!!"

Well if they have no chance its better you know, rather then wasting your money on buying her drinks

Yeah give ya dredit for the way you do things, smoooooth

i got a milion pick up lines ...never use em though...... just not that brave

Well........... tell us a few!! maybe youll inspire someon to use one and get slapped for it hehehehe, cmon- you gotta admit thatd be funny

Let play Titanic..... You yell iceberg ill go down!
Im an umpire... your on report i need your name and number!
I lost my Teddy can i sleep with you?
You must a police officer ...cause you got FINE written all over you!

any way thats painfull enough... sorry ladies

oh, i like the titanic one- hehehehe.
short and sweet- kinda like 'nice shoes.......... wanna f*ck'- i laughed so much i cried!!!! poor guy i dont think that was the intended response

Yer i think theyre great for a laugh but usin em is way risky gotta be brave!!
VERY Brave!

You must be a police officer cause you got FINE writen all over you

FUCKING GOLD BUDDY DEFINATLY USING IT..i don't think i could keep a straight face lol

awww man...BURN. He deserved that then ....seriously what kinda like is F*&K ME?? I was almost dutched couraged enough to try one but couldnt bring my self to do it...

go up to the desired target (so to speak) check thier tage on their shirt and when they ask you what ya doin reply with " I was just checkin if you were made in heaven "
love that personal fave

Yep... i liked the titanic one!! that was fantastic!! LOL.

anyway, i like to use the line that i'm here with my BF and mates because sometimes the guy isn't looking to pick up and just wants to talk. and that way at least you both know the score!

Fair Call.... i just hate when ya try n talk to a chick and they think ya hittin on em, especally when all ya get to is Hi havin a good night?
maybe i just have that effect on women and children.....hmmmmmmmmm

oi that is such a good line...hehe ill use it sometime...well not really cos i dotn liek pick up lines, but if sum1 uses it...lemme know how it goes too

i get some ppl who think i take photos for my personal use :| then you explain to them, and they are like. "oh... ok... kewl...TAKE MY PHOTO NOW, HURRY UP!"

yeh sure, you're just like austin powers...

YOU'RE A LEMUR! YEAH!

LMAO!!

but no, no interesting photo shoots like that

best i've had is 3 chicks at a formal doin the Charlies Angels thing

nickdub you are a friggin funny bugger....10 points to you

but he's pretty well on the money!

Hey, you wanna come back to my place for pizza and sex?

No?

Don't you want pizza?

lol yeh thats always a good one haha

wat sorta pizza we talkn bout......

Now that's a good come-back

GOLD

all these lines.... whatever happened to 'hi'?? and then go from there?

anyway.... wanna play armies?.. i'll pretend i'm the enemy and u can blow me.
ha ha ha ha ha ha ha

mich.. how bout we go turkey shooting.... u can gobble and ill shoot!


anyways.. i must depart from this thread before i get msyelf in trouble with uncle T

me too!!!

feel like a shag...no, well lay down and I'll have one

thats my number 1 pick up line

Oops, sorry. I sometimes trip over it.

im a clubber and im nice to everyone... its not all of us!

im going to try...


if i tickle ur belly button... do u giggle liek elmo?

michael, u should use that line wen ur in uniform

ooo and keep ur camera on ya

hehehehehehehehehehehe tickle me ELMO!!

Hi, I'm morgan... little m, big organ

seems to be effective in bringing a huge smile and a cheeky laugh

LMAO Tash... hrm... well i did get contact details from about 6 clipsal 500 promo girls i was in uniform and had my camera does that count?

yeah im with Mich...


my fave line is "Hello!"


cant help but love the old style ways really

thats wat i ment...........u mean u thought i was meaning something other than that?

seafood!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

GOLD!!

your talking about your shoelace right?.........

ohhhhhh, Scones, jam & whipped cream delivered by our chef- i tell you, words arent needed sometimes!! if only she was a guy

Sorry Hun, didn't mean anyone specifically, i just ment to generalise, that when i have been out in the "club" environment i tend to see LOTS of guys get shot down withouth so much as an introduction.

whereas in the rave enviroment most ppl are happy to talk to anyone, and therefore guys are more willing to approach girls.

*bump*
ok everyone- add your fav pick up lines coz im compiling a book of the weirdest/ funniest/ creepiest/ most spectacular pick up lines EVER!!!!

lol sarah... u need me and meika to log in at the same time again.. i think we blew this thread apart last time

Got this one from Nigel (incognito). Not sure if he's posted it already but:

"I bet you $20 that you reject me".

"i bet you $5 i can make your breast wobble without touching them!!" (grab breasts and put $5 on the bar) "Damn, lost the bet!"

it's an oldie but a classic

ROFL fuggin classic!

Nokky.. belive it or not but i have actually done that one a few times

And look where it got you with me Craig

the first time i did it, was for a dare from unimates!!

since then it's not that hard, (well it still is, but the first time was special!! )

Okay, my personal favourite This one serves two purposes, the first is obvious, but the second is to tell if the guy (or girl) you're trying to pick up is intelligent because sometimes that's just as important :-)

"If I asked you for sex, would the answer be the same as the answer to this question?"

;-)

Aw man... So putting that back in my signature now!

Meanwhile, my friend told me this one, I think it's hilarious but slightly wrong.

*while putting hand slowly towards victim, er i mean, persons mouth*
"Does this smell like chloroform to you?"



G.

'f*ck me if I'm wrong, but havent we met before?'
& 'Have you ever kissed a bunny between the ears?' *pulls pockets out of pants* 'wanna try?'- its so cute

this line has never failed me

"hi i need sex tonight can i do u???"

I like this one!! i'm actually contemplating using this one! See if it works!!

I had someone say somethin to me today... I didn't quite like it but he thought it was great...

Here goes... the GR8 pick up line for March the 1st 2006...

"NICE TITS" (And no it wasn't Rob)

Usually you're left with people with confused looks on their faces, but SOMETIMES you get that pause while they contemplate and then the "Ohhhhh :-)"

*grin*

G.

i had a friend telling me that she had some guy tell her she looked hot with her glasses. lol

i had a drunk ask me if i wanted some of his alchy

I knew i should have written them down yesterday sarah we were going for ages. There were some friggin calssics even i had never heard of.
Some of my all time favorites are and which may have ben posted are:
If i told you ,you had a great body would you hold it against me?
Help Help my penis is suffocating does any one know CPR?
LOL @ one of sarah's - nice shoes wanna f*#K?

OK. If we were at a dance club, and you both noticed me at the same time. Tell me, how you each get my attention and what would your pick up lines be. Who's ever the smoothest wins.

Ok. First. I'd s-s-slide up to the bar. And,tell you that i can't believe how fucking fat you are. I'd tell you that I like the way you make your tities shake, and if you lost a little weight you'd look like Rikki Lake.

FUCK THAT! You'd be dockin me quick. I'd order you a drink, and stir it wit my dick. And then to get, your attention in the crowded place I simply walk up and stick my nuts in your face.

o_0

G.

He gets an A for originality

The only way out of that question is to reply - "Maybe"

tarantrula thats an ICP song aint it????

And still a Maybe is better than a No :-P except in this case a no would be better than a maybe...

>_<

G.

The only reason why I would kick you out of bed is to f**k you on the floor

lol.. nice babe.. as if u need a pick up line tho... hi i'm courtney ought to do it for you every time!

loe your av too hun, that's my girl!!!

Hehe your teaching me well

tee heee heee.. excellent my little protege, excellent!!!

"Hi, Mich said that I'm cool and that I can marry her boyfriend, but I don't go for those backdoor shenanigans, wanta dance?"

bwaaaahaaaahaaaaa.... that ought to work! I dare you to give it a go next time we're out!!! Come one courtz... get on the band wagon and tell Chris (peake) it will work!

from back in the day...

<said like Fabio, the most beautiful man in the whole cosmos>
"Root me"

yea it is it amuses me though lol

Hell yeah that would work

Did you just sit in a water puddle? Or are you just happy to see me?

IV HEARD HEAPS LOL 1 THAT STUCK IN MY HEAD WAS DID U JUST FART CAUSE YOUR BLOW ME AWAY LOL WHEN I HEARD IT

Hi, my name is Doug. That's "god" spelled backwards with a little bit of you wrapped up in it.

So lame bwahahaha

walk up to the target and check the tag on thier shirt...
when they ask what your doin reply with "Im just Checkin if your made in HEAVEN"


Do you belive in love at fist sight?....or should i walk past again?


is that a mirror in your pants? cause i can see myself in em...


is that a ladder in your stockin? or is it the stair way to heaven?


You must be a police officer cause you got FINE written all over you!!

Did this thread ever help anyone in the end?

haha, here's a good one...


'would you like sex?'

and if they say no, then reply 'well, can you lay down while I have some' ha ha ha

LOL thats heaps good you two

no idea. but me and meika had alot of fun early in this thread.

was a source of much amusement

hope there was some inspiration to others on here!


so any success stories of dodgey pick up lines working?

It works.. and with the right amount of alcohol often gets a yes

How YOU doing ?? *Friends Joey Tribbiani style*
FFS, It doesn't work on just anyone!

This post has been edited by shen: Feb 12 2007, 12:08 AM

Yeah but if you do it my style...it works wonders.

I like the line..."Hello" or "Hi"

You dont need pick up lines Sang... hehehe

Im just too shy....teeeheee

If i followed u home would u keep me? *done with puppy dog eyes*

haha who could resist that!?!?!

rofl

Yes!.... Oh, you werent asking me?

Girls doing that and guys doing that is a bit different!

This post has been edited by Scattrd: Feb 12 2007, 09:05 AM

I once picked up a girl literally on a dancefloor & she turned around and said "what the heck are you doing" & I replied "Sorry I just had to pickup the hottest girl in the club tonight".. Got a laugh & it worked too..

I've never used a pick up line in my life, but here goes: "Oh, she doth teach the torches how to burn bright, like a jewel in an ethiop's ear; O beauty, til this night, i never knew thee." completely original i swear

Would either work 400 years ago, or possibly in a library..

Most people can't understand shakespear plays, which i find quite strange as the language has never seemed too hard to understand - much easier than gangsta talk "Yo ma shizzle against the tizzle. I'm a bauler from west gawler. Wa dah tah!"

This post has been edited by jUsTiNcAsE: Feb 12 2007, 10:39 AM

Agree with you totally... But then again English/Drama were always my fav subjects

G.

T wo guys sitting in the office chatting
when this girl passes them going to the toilet.

Bob says "I think she's nice"


Bobs mate "well nip over and give her
the patter"


Bob "the patter?"


Bobs mate "aye the patter"



Bob "I don't know any patter,
I've never found it easy to talk to girls"


"For crying out loud" says Bobs
Mate, "it's easy all you have to say is "hello" and
she will say "hello" Then say "it's a nice day isn't
it"

Then she will say "Yes it is"



Then you say " but not half as nice
as you!"

Then she will say "Oh thank you"


Then the patter will just flow"

Bobs Mate says "look there she
coming back out, go and give it a go"


So nervously off he goes, re-running
the patter in his head

He walks up and says "Hello"
She says "Hello"

He says "It's a nice day isn't it?"

She says "Yes it is"



He says "but not half as nice as you"



She says "Oh thank you"



Few seconds of uneasy silence..............................



Then he says..............

"Been for a shit then?"

"Hey there babe, would you turn my wall on?"

It's ok, Lucy knows what it means

Yes...Yes I do...

yeh sang.. it always worked before...

hey Baby would you like to try some DVDA?

Hahahah orgasmo!

An Australian is sitting at a bar in New York City and looks at

his watch several times in the space of a few minutes.

The woman sitting nearby notices this and asks, "Is your date

runninglate?"

"No," he replies, "I have this state-of-the-art watch. I was just

testing it."

The intrigued woman says, "A state-of-the-art watch? What's so

special about it?"

The Aussie explains, "It uses alpha waves to talk to me

telepathically."

The lady says, "What's it telling you now?"

"Well, it says you're not wearing any panties."

The woman giggles and replies, "Well it must be broken because I

am wearing panties!''

The Aussie smirks, taps his watch and says, "Bloody things running

about an hour fast, can I buy you a drink?

Saw a dude try this one before

"Hi there, where abouts are you from". Girl replied "North Adelaide" & then he said "What a coincidence, I'be been to North Adelaide before"

Oh dear!!!

I heard a sweet one on 2 and a half men last night

Charlie Sheen's mum says "You look exactly like my 5th husband"

Man says "So how many times have you been married?"

Charlie's mum "Oh 4 times"

LOL